Sunday, April 29, 2012

My Prayer

After a restless night's sleep the other night, I decided to write down my thoughts. It ended up being this prayer: Dear God, I praise you for your omnipotence,  awesomeness, holiness.  I praise you because you are a mighty, wonderful, loving God.  Thank you for your mercy, thank you for saving even me, thank you for your love and care.  Thank you for always working all things together for good.  Thank you for knowing what is in our hearts, even before we ask.  Thank you for your goodness.   My Lord and my God, thank you for giving us a heart to adopt.  Thank you for what you have already done in this adoption and what you are going to do.   Lord,  I find myself feeling discouraged, weak, alone, and helpless in this process.  Please forgive me for my doubts and fears. Please help me to wipe away these feelings and rely on You completely.  Your works are wonderful, thank you for being a God of compassion and comfort. Please  help me to trust in You and rely on Your perfect timing.  Please give me a renewed energy to complete your work.  Please prepare our hearts and minds for what you have for us.   Lord, please prepare your chosen  child's heart to be ready to be part of this family.  Give him peaceful nights sleep, give him nourishment, calm his cry.  Please heal emotional and physical ailments he may have and Lord, may we please get to him soon?   Please prepare all of our family's hearts to accept this child and cherish this child, just as you already do.  Break our hearts for what breaks Yours. And Lord, I know this adoption can only come from you.  Please show me the next steps you want me to take.  Please help me to trust.  You have everything in control. Thank you for this miracle you are doing in this adoption.  May  we give you all the praise and glory with every step...both the highs and the lows. I can't thank you enough for giving me breathe, and for blessing even me with Robert and our kids.  I'm so undeserving and yet your mercy is astounding and humbly brings me to tears.  Thank you, my God, my Savior, my Father. I pray in Your name, Amen

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

God cares

I woke up this morning in tears and having an overwhelming sense to just pray for our child and our adoption. I have no idea why and I can't really describe this feeling. Our little son is always on my mind, in my dreams, and I am constantly praying, but this morning felt different. Again, I don't know how to describe it. All I can make of it is God is moving in this...He's putting all the pieces together. I have wondered if our child is heart broken today and maybe God is having me feel some of his pain...or maybe a family member of our son is saying goodbye? I just don't know. While I was teaching this mornings Bible lesson, one of the suggested teacher's questions was to ask the class what the verse means when it says "look at the birds of the air..our Heavenly Father takes care of them...are you much more valuable than they?". I want every child to know how valuable they are. It tears me to think that some children (even adults) don't know this!!! I needed to be reminded of that today. Our Father does care, we are valuable, He will take care of us!!! And of course (because even teachers get the right lesson at the right time) our lesson was on Peter walking on the water, until he took his eyes off Jesus, became afraid, and began to sink. Then Jesus reached out His hand...Needless to say this morning's lesson had me blinking tears, trying not to let the class notice. I was reading through my last post. After reflecting back, I see now I was wrong about something...that path was never "dirty" or "dusty". It's a beautiful path, because our Saviour is leading us through it every step of the way. It may not be an easy path, but I will walk it a million times if it's what it takes to follow my God. I will take all the bumps, all the rocks, all the bruises, and anything else it may have if it means we get to have God's child. I am thankful for that path!!! Lastly, we have made a decision regarding a choice we had. We are going to continue adopting through Ghana. We both feel God gave us our little boy to bring us to Ghana, and we are to carry on. We knew back when we first started, nothing was guaranteed, and although our hearts broke after losing our little Noel, we feel God gave us Noel to bring us to Ghana for the reason of adopting another child in His perfect timing. Again, we really need your prayers. We look forward to seeing this miracle!

Thursday, February 16, 2012

In His Time

It's been over two months now since we found out the little boy we were trying to adopt is no longer in the orphanage.  We still don't have answers to where he is or what happened.  However, we know God has another little one for us and His timing and plans are perfect. 

As I look back at the last couple months, I envision Robert and I happily walking along a beautiful path, and then out of no where, our legs were swept out from under us, leaving us lying there, confused and dusty...and the path is no longer beautiful.  After taking time to breathe, heal, and pray, we feel we are now ready to carry on and complete what God has started in our lives.  We are helping each other up, dusting ourselves off,  and even though the path is unclear, we will continue on one step at a time.

The song "In His Time" comes to my mind often.  The lyrics are:
In His Time, in His Time.
He makes all things beautiful, in His time.
Lord, please show me every day,
As You're teaching me Your way,
That You do just what You say,
In Your Time

In Your time, in Your time,
You make all things beautiful, in Your time.
Lord, my life to You I bring,
May each song I have to sing,
Be to You a lovely thing,
In Your time.

Honestly, I wish it could be MY time, I want more than anything to know the child He has for us and have this child in my arms right now.  But it's not about me or my wants...it's about Him, and Him knowing what is best.  He already knows the desires of our hearts, we need to have faith and trust that He is going to complete this blessing, and we are to give Him all the praise and glory along the way!

Without going into a lot of details, we are faced with a decision...I guess you could say it's two different paths.  One path seems easier and shorter; the other path is longer, but may possibly have a clearer outcome.  Either path we take will still need some major funding, about $16,000.  Although we have been praying about both ways, neither of us feel God calling us one way or another.  Please pray with us for wisdom and discernment, for clear direction, and for peace in our hearts.  Also, please pray that we will find a fundraising opportunity and for a funding miracle to happen.

Thank you for taking time to read this and thank you for your prayers, concern, and love.  Your support means a lot to us.



God sets the lonely in families.